oh emotions!!!

So Charles graduated from that awful SERE training and has his certificate! I was so excited and proud...when i heard his voice Friday i just started to cry! he told me he had even better news....today he is going to Oklahoma!! him and Hansen had the same flight arrangements, so as we read...hes coming closer to home!!

Charles started playing World of Warcraft....AGAIN :( this is not going to be good because it takes up all of his time. It used to make us fight all the time because he would forget our "dates" or make him not want to talk because of the game, but it should be ok because of the baby coming...i hope.

I picked up his wedding band from JB Robinson yesterday....while he was at SERE i got it resized and ENGRAVED! he didn't know until i told/showed him yesterday on our web cam date. HEs EXCITED! I told him i would over night the ring as soon as he gives me his address...which should be very very soon!

THEN....I went to work last night....
I think i should have just stayed home. One of the patients that i have been caring for past away in a code around 1200 yesterday. I did everything i could for him before i left at 0730 but the doctor would not listen to me....he was very unsettled and worried about death. he spoke of how his family is in denial and wont get things done that he wanted done...and referred to the one cancer doctor as dr. death. i really got attached to him. he always put a smile on my face as i did with him. we talked about everything. i even shaved him the last night he was alive....
when i found this out i was a wreck...it really set the tone for the rest of the night too...i got an admission 30 min before i was to leave, a doctor came to dictate a discharge summary and was asking a million questions...yet if he would have looked in the chart he would have seen everything. agh!

but the patient i spoke of is truly in a better place and he is where he can be at rest. it just bothers me and works my nerve the actual death that he had. no one should be unsettled. no one should be anxious. everyone deserves to die with dignity and i don't believe he did...esp after what i heard about the code experience. i am not going to share that but lets just say the jerk of a doctor that would not prescribe what i wanted to give him the morning he past away pretty much just stood there.

i don't really want to end on a sad note...soooo....charles will be in OKLAHOMA in 1 hr!!!!